Of Growing Up and Chickens

By Angel de Armendi
Music Director
Unitarian Universalist Church of Tallahassee

As I grow older, I find that I often judge my life, namely by the things I do and the things I don’t, by the things I want to do and the things I wish I did not have to.  When I was much younger, pre-teen years let’s say, I did not think much of what I did and didn’t.  Instead, I lived in the present like there was no tomorrow.  I did not worry much compared to present-day standards about the food or lack thereof I was to eat every day, how ethical was my living, what went on to bring about the sustenance of myself and family, and the rest of those invisible threads seemingly spun by fate that eventually tangle up one’s adult life. 

Everything seemed so much simpler and beautiful in the good old days!  Ignorance can be blissful, and I guess as children it is important to have those thick layers of naiveté to grow up in hope, learn how to love, and find beauty in the world at every corner, no matter how marred by decay.  Yet the deterioration of our world is marked by our own actions, what we choose to do and don’t.  And our lives, though so short, are full of tremendous potential.

But let’s back up to those days of enjoyment outside the realm of adulthood, like waking up on Saturdays and getting lost in the local river all day only to be punished later by a worrisome parent who did not know where you were.  How could you relate, how could you possibly understand apprehension and fear then? 

de Armendi with Terri and Tikka

Sometimes I think that my life as a kid was like being a chicken.  They both eat when food is served, or not. If they do not eat, something is wrong; you change the food or take them to the doctor.  They get lost and often do not tell you where they went– often over at the neighbor’s, creating havoc.  The first time I got lost like that, my mother actually pulled a belt and hit me for the first and only time, and, not understanding the punishment at all, I cried, puffed, and told myself I would never speak to her again, only to forget the next morn. 

When I punish my chickens with an early retirement to the coop because they have been naughty, they do make a ruckus, but the next day, they adoringly follow me around, waiting for the next meal.  These chickens are so dependent on me that an intense feeling of caring and dedication become part of my life.  They imbue my routine with a certain purpose that is ever fresh and forgiving, simple and beautiful.  Research tells us that people with pets live longer, I bet that people that work with children also do.  But I digress. 

So why give up youth and noble simplicity for adulthood and an array of daily concerns?  Thoreau writes “Age is no better, hardly so well qualified for an instructor as youth, for it has not profited so much as it has lost. One may almost doubt if the wisest man has learned anything of absolute value by living.”

Thus I have over the last years decided to retrace my steps and become more like a child, or learn a thing or two from my chickens.  This entails giving up my fears, forgiving, accepting, hoping, believing, and having a tremendous amount of faith.  Who thought that youth was so amazing, I now do! 

When invited to attend the Greek Festival on Saturday I politely declined stating that the Greek Orthodox Church that profits from it is an institution that treats same-sex loving couples as second-class citizens.  I let go of my anger by forgiving and not harboring negative feelings toward that institution, while at the same time making the simple choice of not supporting it.  I did not give it a second thought and went on with my day.  I engaged in gardening, tending to my pets, getting lost and giving in to simple necessities and lovely projects.  As Thoreau notes, I want “Every morning [to be] a cheerful invitation to make my life of equal simplicity, and I may say innocence, with Nature herself”.  

It is amazing to be human.  Grow from a toddler as simple minded as a fowl into a conscious adult with full reins of one’s own life, with the responsibilities and freedoms it entails.  Yet, it is more amazing to choose to remain in touch with your inner child and live a hundred percent into fulfilling your ethics and ideals.