There are times when being a minister brings an abrupt halt to all
conversation. One of those times is when someone swears. It goes
something like this, “Expletive!” Long pause, while speaker looks at me
—often with a sheepish grin —“Sorry, I shouldn’t swear in front of a minister,”
the guilty person apologizes.
Now, of course, all eyes are on me and it’s my turn to hit just the right
note of saintliness. I’ve tried making a weak joke, something on the order
of “You’re forgiven…this time.” I’ve ventured a brief version of
the theological constructs suggesting that clergy shares a simple humanity with
everyone else. I haven’t yet tried responding, with a dead pan:
“That’s okay, I swear like a sailor myself.”
The truth, of course, is that I do swear, because I share humanity and basic
biology with every other human being on the planet. Nearly every language
contains a compendium of swear words. Swearing shares traits across those
languages. The two major categories for swearing remain constant:
they usually relate to deity or to body parts and bodily functions. For
example, fans of the movie Gone with the Wind will remember the famous
line Clark Gable uttered as he turned his back on the plantation.
“Frankly, Scarlett, I don’t give a damn.”
This is, of course, a short version of the epithet which calls upon the
deity to destroy forever ones foe. Skipping across the generations to
another memorable movie scene, those who absorbed the dark humor of Butch
Cassidy and the Sundance Kid, may also remember the one word that echoed
through the canyon as Butch and Sundance jumped off the cliff to the river
below. (Sh---t). A third category of swearing relates to relatives. I’ll
let you recall an example of that on your own.
I swear, but, like many of you, I try not to let loose in public very
often. I do my really good swearing when I’ve botched up a project I’m
working on, or when I’ve managed to slice my finger instead of the loaf of
bread, or when I’ve just had it and “I can’t take it anymore.” Oh, and
especially when a computer destroys a half-written sermon, or otherwise makes
my life miserable.
I wasn’t surprised to learn that most researchers think women swear less
than men, and only a few posit the theory that women may swear as much as men
—but, in more specific situations. I was surprised to read that women
swear in groups of women as a sign of trust. I can confirm that women swear
more easily in a group of women. I’d always thought of that swearing as a
sign of feeling free from a male-dominated culture. I’d never thought of it as
a signal of the bonding with the group.
Which brings us to the question of what purpose swearing serves— which also
begs the question of whether good people, or those who are presumed to be
saintly (like ministers), should pursue a cultural taboo against all
swearing. Brain biology suggests that swearing will always be with
us. Swear words are remembered and processed differently than other
language. The words themselves are remembered as whole units, and they
are processed in the lower regions of the brain devoted to emotion and
instinct. Some studies show that people who’ve suffered brain damage that left
them aphasic (unable to talk) can still swear.**
It’s good to know that someday when my brain has dwindled to the size of a
walnut, and when someone apologizes for swearing in front of a minister, I
won’t have to search for a witty or forgiving response, I might just swear back
at ‘em.
** Tracy Wilson, How Swearing Works, http://www.howstuffworks.com/swearing.htm.
Accessed August 2009.
